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The foundations of friendship -

When it comes to building the foundations of a true friendship, everyone knows that one of the most important elements is compassion.

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Shared pain - Derived from the Latin word for "shared pain," the word "compassion" refers to the empathy that we feel for another person when they are suffering or going through something difficult.

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Necessary for friendship -

Most people recognize that compassion is necessary when it comes to forming and maintaining friendships. A lesser-known concept, however, is confelicity.

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Shared happiness -

Derived from the Latin word for "shared happiness," confelicity refers to the feeling of happiness that you get when something great happens to someone you love.

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Examples -

For example, you may feel confelicitous when you see your kids open presents, or you witness a friend pass an important exam.

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Different relationships -

There are all sorts of situations that can make us feel confelicitous, and confelicity exists in all sorts of relationships.

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Important facet -

This feeling of shared happiness is an important facet of friendship. In fact, there are some studies that suggest it is more important than compassion.

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Grasping the concept -

Many people experience confelicity in a very natural way, and therefore find the concept very easy to grasp. For others, it can be more difficult.

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Confelicity vs. schadenfreude -

In order to illustrate better exactly what confelicity means, it can be helpful to consider the opposite: "schadenfreude."

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Confelicity vs. schadenfreude -

Schadenfreude is a German word that refers to the pleasure derived from witnessing another person's misfortune. Unfortunately, this is a very natural and common occurrence.

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Confelicity vs. schadenfreude -

Confelicity is the opposite of schadenfreude. It is the pleasure that is derived from witnessing another person's good fortune. It is also a natural emotion, but it can take some work.

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Absence of jealousy -

Another way to think of confelicity is as the absence of jealousy. In order to celebrate in another person's success, we need to abandon our sense of ego and competition.

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Why confelicity is so important -

Confelicity is important for two main reasons. On the one hand, it helps strengthen relationships and build community.

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Creating bonds -

Feeling genuine happiness at another person's success, and sharing that happiness with others, is a great way to build and maintain strong social bonds.

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Improving well-being -

The second reason is that confelicity can improve our own sense of happiness and well-being. After all, when we consistently wish the best for others, it reflects back on us.

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Freeing up space -

By refusing to spend time comparing ourselves with others and wishing negative things would happen to them, we also free up a lot of brain power.

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Genuine celebration - We gain the space to focus on our own abilities and our own journey, and we become able to genuinely celebrate others' successes without pretense or expectation.

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How to practice confelicity - Confelicity comes more naturally to some people than others. Thankfully, however, there are things we can all do to practice confelicity in our everyday lives.

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Feel happy for others -

A good place to start, although it may sound obvious, is simply to be happy for other people when they succeed. Bear in mind that you might have to 'fake it 'til you make it.'

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Example -

For example, it may be difficult to feel genuine happiness for someone when they get promoted to your dream job instead of you, but it is important to congratulate them anyway.

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Practice makes perfect -

Remember that, as with anything in life, practice makes perfect, and by actively practicing confelicity, it will gradually start to come more naturally.

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Take it public -

Another important step is to start publicizing the joy you take in witnessing others' success. A good way to do this is via social media.

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Examples - For example, if you have a friend whose business is taking off, or whose charity work you find impressive, call it out on Instagram or TikTok, for instance.

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Double benefit -

Offering up genuine praise and celebrating publicly in people's successes will both make you feel great, and encourage other people to do the same.

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Practice compassion - Another way to improve the levels of confelicity in your life is to practice compassion. Never underestimate the power of offering support to those who are suffering.

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Compassion and confelicity - Of course, as previously mentioned, compassion is different from confelicity. However, if compassion exists within a relationship, confelicity is more likely to also be present.

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How it works - Indeed, if you are really there for someone who is struggling, you will be even more ready to share in their success when things start to look up.

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Surround yourself with positive people -

The last good way to practice confelicity is to surround yourself with people who are positive and who consistently focus on the good in others.

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Positivity catches -

After all, positivity is infectious, so it is worth taking the time to surround yourself with people who will encourage you to have the right attitude.

Sources: (BBC) (Enough Already)

See also: 30 different symbols of kindness and compassion

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