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Uninvited guests -

Most people are familiar with the concept of an uninvited guest. Indeed, it happens all too often that people show up at parties, despite not having been invited.

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Uninvited Buddhas -

Fewer people are familiar with the concept of an Uninvited Buddha. This term was first used by author Andrea Miller during her podcast ‘Getting Open.’

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An annoying or disruptive character -

An Uninvited Buddha is someone who shows up in your life and, at face value, serves no other purpose than to cause you grief.

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With important wisdom to impart -

However, when you scratch below the surface, the Uninvited Buddha always has a lesson to teach you. The lesson is usually one you didn't know you needed to learn.

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Examples -

To help illustrate the concept better, let’s look at some common examples. First up is that friend who checks you on your behavior and tells you when you’re wrong.

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The friend who checks you on your behavior -

For example, imagine you lash out at a family member because they make a suggestion about how you should do something. You may perceive this as a critique.

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The friend who checks you on your behavior -

Of course, criticism can be difficult to hear, particularly if it triggers long-held insecurities. However, it generally isn't a reason to lash out or criticize back.

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The lesson -

The Uninvited Buddha in this scenario is that friend who checks you for overreacting. In the moment, it may seem like they are not supporting you, but they're trying to help you see a situation more clearly.

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The friend who won't let you off the hook -

Next up is that person who refuses to let you off the hook. Of course, there should be a limit to stubbornness, and forgiveness is always an important lesson.

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The friend who won't let you off the hook -

We've all been in situations where we have apologized to someone for something we have done. Sometimes, they simply won’t accept the apology. It can be absolutely infuriating.

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The friend who won't let you off the hook -

Most of the time, people who refuse an apology do so because they sense it is not sincere. Sometimes, we may rush to apologize to others for the wrong reason.

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The lesson -

The Uninvited Buddha in this scenario, then, is that person who refuses to let you off the hook. It can feel like a kick in the teeth, but in fact it is one of the important ways we grow.

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The person who is mean for no reason -

Another common Uninvited Buddha is that person who shames you or makes you feel bad about yourself for no reason.

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The person who is mean for no reason -

We've all been in situations where another person has made a snide comment about us or suggested we are inferior in some way.

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The person who is mean for no reason -

Such malicious behavior can make us feel terrible in the moment. Upon reflection, however, there is an important lesson to be learned.

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The lesson -

The lesson from this Uninvited Buddha is that we are not obliged to buy into anything other people say about us. Often, their comments reflect solely upon themselves.

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The person who is always late -

There are those who are always late and seem completely incapable of changing their habits. It could be a colleague, friend, or family member.

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The person who is always late -

Chronically late people can be very frustrating. They can provoke feelings of distrust and even shame. For example, perhaps you were always the last child picked up from school and it left you feeling ashamed.

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The person who is always late -

This Uninvited Buddha may have an important lesson to teach us, however, about the fact we cannot control our timelines, even if we are desperate to do so.

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The lesson -

This Uninvited Buddha can teach us about the importance of not setting unrealistic expectations for other people or putting them on pedestals.

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The person who always speaks over others -

The next Uninvited Buddha on the list is that person who always speaks over others. Most people know someone like this, or maybe you can identify with this behavior. 

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The person who always speaks over others -

Being interrupted and spoken over can be very annoying, particularly for people who are already shy and introverted.

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The person who always speaks over others -

However, everyone can learn a lesson from this Uninvited Buddha about being more assertive and setting boundaries with other people.

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The lesson -

Having someone in your life who doesn’t realize or simply doesn’t care when they are talking over you can help you identify strategies in which you can make yourself heard.

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The person who ghosts -

And, finally, we have the Uninvited Buddha who ghosts. Many of us have been in a situation where we’ve been speaking to someone, whether romantically or platonically, and, suddenly, they disappear.

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The person who ghosts -

Being ghosted can be very difficult, as it leaves people feeling very rejected and confused. There is always a silver lining, however.

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The person who ghosts -

On the one hand, being ghosted by your Uninvited Buddha provides you with an opportunity to reconsider your self-worth and maybe come to the realization that that person is not supposed to be in your life.

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The lesson -

On the other hand, this Uninvited Buddha can help you realize which qualities you seek in friendships and romantic partners. It can also highlight which qualities you should try to avoid.

Sources: (YourTango)

See also: The different types of emotions and their effect on human behavior

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