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Seeking attention -

Your little one may act out if they are seeking attention. They may feel left out and want to be included more, and thus, cry, scream, or yell to alert you.

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Seeking attention -

When your child is misbehaving, they are seeking a reaction from you. It's best to ignore the negative behavior and praise only positive behavior to reinforce it. 

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Imitating others' behavior -

Kids will often view people who are misbehaving in real life, on TV, or in movies. They will then try and imitate those behaviors even if they are negative.

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Imitating others' behavior -

As a parent, be sure to try and limit exposure to negative influences and model positive behavior. Kids should consistently be exposed to positivity.

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Testing limits - As they grow up, kids will try and test boundaries to see what they can get away with. They will watch you and your reactions closely.

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Testing limits -

You are the parent, remember that. You can set clear, consistent limits and consequences to show that rules are non-negotiable.

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Lacking necessary skills -

Children may feel that they don't have any choice but to act out. Misbehavior may stem from a lack of skills in problem-solving or communication. 

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Lacking necessary skills -

It's your role as a parental figure to teach the necessary skills by showing them what to do instead of punishing their misbehavior.

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Expressing independence - As children grow and mature they want to assert their independence. They might act out to see the response (or lack thereof) to their newfound independence.

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Expressing independence -

Offer age-appropriate choices and freedom, allowing them to feel independent within boundaries. Try offering two options so it gives them the opportunity to make their own decision. 

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Experiencing big emotions -

As they grow up, children are learning how to handle their emotions. Overwhelming emotions (anger, excitement, stress) can lead to outbursts.

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Experiencing big emotions -

Teach emotional vocabulary and coping strategies so they can express their feelings appropriately. Help your kid have the words to match their feelings and teach them to share with words instead of showcasing their big emotions.

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Having unmet needs -

Kids can act out if they are hungry, tired, or even ill. These factors can cause them to feel bad and therefore behave badly.

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Having unmet needs -

Be proactive in recognizing and addressing their basic needs to prevent misbehavior. Ensure you keep track of things like when they last ate and if they've had enough water today.

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Exerting power and control -

Kids may want to assert control, leading to defiant behavior. Kids can often feel like their voices aren't heard and their choices aren't valued.

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Exerting power and control -

Talk with your child and let them know they are valued. Pay specific attention to their needs, wants, and desires and try to work together to reach an agreeable solution.

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Learning that misbehavior works -

If misbehavior gets them what they want, they'll likely continue. For example, if whining leads to getting a toy then they learn that one equals the other.

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Learning that misbehavior works -

Don’t reinforce misbehavior by giving in. When they're acting up, hold firm with boundaries and consequences.

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Boredom -

If your kiddos are not stimulated or don’t have enough to occupy their time, they may act out to entertain themselves or seek excitement.

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Boredom -

As a parent, you can provide engaging activities, rotate toys, or introduce new challenges to keep them mentally and physically active.

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Inconsistency in rules or discipline -

If you as the parent or caregiver are inconsistent in enforcing rules or consequences, then the children may become confused and test limits to see what will happen.

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Inconsistency in rules or discipline - To help your child, try and be consistent with rules, boundaries, and consequences, ensuring that they are the same or very similar across different situations.

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Seeking revenge -

If your child feels like they've been unfairly treated or are powerless, then they may act out to seek revenge. This is especially true if they feel they’ve been wronged by a sibling, friend, or parent.

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Seeking revenge - Address any feelings of unfairness, and teach conflict resolution skills. Help the child express feelings without resorting to retaliatory behavior.

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Changes in routine or environment -

For children, having a routine is essential, and disruptions (such as moving, a new sibling, or a change in school) can lead to anxiety and misbehavior.

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Changes in routine or environment -

As the parent, you can offer reassurance. Additionally, try to maintain as much routine as possible, and communicate clearly about upcoming changes to reduce anxiety.

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Feeling overwhelmed by expectations -

When kids feel that too much is expected of them, either academically or socially, they may act out as a way of expressing frustration or feeling inadequate.

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Feeling overwhelmed by expectations - Setting realistic expectations and breaking tasks into smaller more manageable steps can help. Also, provide encouragement and support when they struggle.

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Underlying mental health issues -

Conditions like ADHD or other neurodivergent traits can make following rules and regulating impulses harder for your children.

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Underlying mental health issues -

If you suspect underlying mental health issues, be sure to seek professional support for an evaluation and guidance.

Sources: (Parents) (Penn State Extension)

See also: Things parents should never say to their kids

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