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See Also
See Again
© Shutterstock
0 / 31 Fotos
Long-term relationships
- If you have ever been in a long-term relationship, you’ll know that the love you feel for your partner at the beginning can feel very different from the love you feel later on.
© Shutterstock
1 / 31 Fotos
Scientific theory
- American social psychologist Elaine Hatfield, who is considered a pioneer of the scientific study of love, described two different types of love: passionate and compassionate.
© Shutterstock
2 / 31 Fotos
Passionate vs. compassionate
- In a nutshell, passionate love is all about intense feelings and sexual attraction, while compassionate love is about mutual respect, trust, and affection.
© Shutterstock
3 / 31 Fotos
Different stages
- Both types of love are important, but they tend to take center stage at different phases of a relationship. Passionate love normally emerges during the early stages, just as two people are getting to know each other.
© Shutterstock
4 / 31 Fotos
Different stages
- Once passionate love has brought people together and they have made a connection, compassionate love can swoop in and seal the deal.
© Shutterstock
5 / 31 Fotos
Characteristics of passionate love
- Let's look at the characteristics of passionate love first. A key indicator of passionate love is having intrusive thoughts about the other person.
© Shutterstock
6 / 31 Fotos
Intrusive thoughts - People experiencing passionate love may think about their partner almost constantly, and the thoughts can intrude at any time, day or night.
© Shutterstock
7 / 31 Fotos
Idealization
- Another cognitive characteristic of passionate love is idealization of the other person. When in passionate love, we tend to believe our partner can do no wrong.
© Shutterstock
8 / 31 Fotos
Idealization
- We also tend to think that our relationship in general is perfect and that nothing could possibly go wrong, now or in the future.
© Shutterstock
9 / 31 Fotos
Wanting to know...
- Another sign of being in passionate love is wanting to know everything about your partner. Of course, this does make more sense if you’ve just met someone.
© Shutterstock
10 / 31 Fotos
... and be known
- In addition to wanting to know everything about them, passionate love can make you want to share things about yourself, too.
© Shutterstock
11 / 31 Fotos
Strong emotions
- One of the hallmarks of passionate love is having very strong emotions, whether positive or negative. When things are going well, passionate love can make us feel elated.
© Shutterstock
12 / 31 Fotos
Strong emotions
- When things are not going so well, however, we tend to feel absolutely devastated, even if the problems are not particularly serious.
© Shutterstock
13 / 31 Fotos
Desire to maintain physical closeness - The final important characteristic of passionate love is a need to maintain physical closeness as much of the time as possible.
© Shutterstock
14 / 31 Fotos
Desire to maintain physical closeness - In addition to feeling a strong attraction for the other person, passionate love can make us feel that we need to be around them all the time.
© Shutterstock
15 / 31 Fotos
Compassionate love
- Whereas passionate love is characterized by intensity, compassionate love is more about trust, commitment, and having a deeply intimate connection.
© Shutterstock
16 / 31 Fotos
Less urgent feelings
- Of course, people in compassionate love can still feel passion towards one another, but in general the feelings are less overwhelming and urgent.
© Shutterstock
17 / 31 Fotos
Really knowing a person
- This type of love is about caring deeply for the other person, knowing them inside out, and being there for them even when times get tough.
© Shutterstock
18 / 31 Fotos
Characteristics of compassionate love: long-term commitment
- Let’s look now at the main indicators of compassionate love. First up is long-term commitment; this type of love is about a commitment to one another that stands the test of time.
© Shutterstock
19 / 31 Fotos
Deep intimacy
- Next up is deep intimacy. People experiencing compassionate love can be completely themselves around one another, and their relationship involves the mutual sharing of feelings and concerns.
© Shutterstock
20 / 31 Fotos
Trust
- And finally, there’s trust. An important hallmark of compassionate love is being able to trust your partner completely. This level of trust can take time to achieve.
© Shutterstock
21 / 31 Fotos
Contributing factors
- According to Hatfield, there are several factors that influence whether two people will end up in passionate or compassionate love.
© Shutterstock
22 / 31 Fotos
Timing
- The first is timing. If you feel that you are not ready to be in a relationship at the time you meet someone, for example, your feelings of passion are unlikely to progress.
© Shutterstock
23 / 31 Fotos
Attachment styles
- Another factor at play is attachment styles. People who are securely attached are more likely to experience longer-lasting compassionate love, whereas people who are anxiously attached may fall in and out of love more quickly.
© Shutterstock
24 / 31 Fotos
Attachment styles
- That is not to say that securely attached people do not feel passionate love. It’s just that for these people, that love is more likely to develop into something compassionate and longer lasting.
© Shutterstock
25 / 31 Fotos
Compatibility
- Another factor that influences whether love will progress from passionate to compassionate is compatibility.
© Shutterstock
26 / 31 Fotos
Compatibility
- We tend to fall in compassionate love with people who are like us. While it’s true that sometimes opposites attract, in general people are more likely to stay in love if they have things in common.
© Shutterstock
27 / 31 Fotos
Tips to rekindle passionate love - If you are currently in a long-term relationship and are looking to rekindle some of that passionate love you felt during the early days, there are lots of strategies you can try.
© Shutterstock
28 / 31 Fotos
Ideas
- Spending time together going on adventures or trying new things is great. For example, you could take a dance or cooking class together, or go on a trip.
© Shutterstock
29 / 31 Fotos
Ultimate goal
- Ultimately, it’s all about finding something that will allow feelings of intimacy, trust, and romantic passion to grow and flourish. Sources: (Verywell Mind) (BetterHelp) See also: The seven new love languages explained
© Shutterstock
30 / 31 Fotos
© Shutterstock
0 / 31 Fotos
Long-term relationships
- If you have ever been in a long-term relationship, you’ll know that the love you feel for your partner at the beginning can feel very different from the love you feel later on.
© Shutterstock
1 / 31 Fotos
Scientific theory
- American social psychologist Elaine Hatfield, who is considered a pioneer of the scientific study of love, described two different types of love: passionate and compassionate.
© Shutterstock
2 / 31 Fotos
Passionate vs. compassionate
- In a nutshell, passionate love is all about intense feelings and sexual attraction, while compassionate love is about mutual respect, trust, and affection.
© Shutterstock
3 / 31 Fotos
Different stages
- Both types of love are important, but they tend to take center stage at different phases of a relationship. Passionate love normally emerges during the early stages, just as two people are getting to know each other.
© Shutterstock
4 / 31 Fotos
Different stages
- Once passionate love has brought people together and they have made a connection, compassionate love can swoop in and seal the deal.
© Shutterstock
5 / 31 Fotos
Characteristics of passionate love
- Let's look at the characteristics of passionate love first. A key indicator of passionate love is having intrusive thoughts about the other person.
© Shutterstock
6 / 31 Fotos
Intrusive thoughts - People experiencing passionate love may think about their partner almost constantly, and the thoughts can intrude at any time, day or night.
© Shutterstock
7 / 31 Fotos
Idealization
- Another cognitive characteristic of passionate love is idealization of the other person. When in passionate love, we tend to believe our partner can do no wrong.
© Shutterstock
8 / 31 Fotos
Idealization
- We also tend to think that our relationship in general is perfect and that nothing could possibly go wrong, now or in the future.
© Shutterstock
9 / 31 Fotos
Wanting to know...
- Another sign of being in passionate love is wanting to know everything about your partner. Of course, this does make more sense if you’ve just met someone.
© Shutterstock
10 / 31 Fotos
... and be known
- In addition to wanting to know everything about them, passionate love can make you want to share things about yourself, too.
© Shutterstock
11 / 31 Fotos
Strong emotions
- One of the hallmarks of passionate love is having very strong emotions, whether positive or negative. When things are going well, passionate love can make us feel elated.
© Shutterstock
12 / 31 Fotos
Strong emotions
- When things are not going so well, however, we tend to feel absolutely devastated, even if the problems are not particularly serious.
© Shutterstock
13 / 31 Fotos
Desire to maintain physical closeness - The final important characteristic of passionate love is a need to maintain physical closeness as much of the time as possible.
© Shutterstock
14 / 31 Fotos
Desire to maintain physical closeness - In addition to feeling a strong attraction for the other person, passionate love can make us feel that we need to be around them all the time.
© Shutterstock
15 / 31 Fotos
Compassionate love
- Whereas passionate love is characterized by intensity, compassionate love is more about trust, commitment, and having a deeply intimate connection.
© Shutterstock
16 / 31 Fotos
Less urgent feelings
- Of course, people in compassionate love can still feel passion towards one another, but in general the feelings are less overwhelming and urgent.
© Shutterstock
17 / 31 Fotos
Really knowing a person
- This type of love is about caring deeply for the other person, knowing them inside out, and being there for them even when times get tough.
© Shutterstock
18 / 31 Fotos
Characteristics of compassionate love: long-term commitment
- Let’s look now at the main indicators of compassionate love. First up is long-term commitment; this type of love is about a commitment to one another that stands the test of time.
© Shutterstock
19 / 31 Fotos
Deep intimacy
- Next up is deep intimacy. People experiencing compassionate love can be completely themselves around one another, and their relationship involves the mutual sharing of feelings and concerns.
© Shutterstock
20 / 31 Fotos
Trust
- And finally, there’s trust. An important hallmark of compassionate love is being able to trust your partner completely. This level of trust can take time to achieve.
© Shutterstock
21 / 31 Fotos
Contributing factors
- According to Hatfield, there are several factors that influence whether two people will end up in passionate or compassionate love.
© Shutterstock
22 / 31 Fotos
Timing
- The first is timing. If you feel that you are not ready to be in a relationship at the time you meet someone, for example, your feelings of passion are unlikely to progress.
© Shutterstock
23 / 31 Fotos
Attachment styles
- Another factor at play is attachment styles. People who are securely attached are more likely to experience longer-lasting compassionate love, whereas people who are anxiously attached may fall in and out of love more quickly.
© Shutterstock
24 / 31 Fotos
Attachment styles
- That is not to say that securely attached people do not feel passionate love. It’s just that for these people, that love is more likely to develop into something compassionate and longer lasting.
© Shutterstock
25 / 31 Fotos
Compatibility
- Another factor that influences whether love will progress from passionate to compassionate is compatibility.
© Shutterstock
26 / 31 Fotos
Compatibility
- We tend to fall in compassionate love with people who are like us. While it’s true that sometimes opposites attract, in general people are more likely to stay in love if they have things in common.
© Shutterstock
27 / 31 Fotos
Tips to rekindle passionate love - If you are currently in a long-term relationship and are looking to rekindle some of that passionate love you felt during the early days, there are lots of strategies you can try.
© Shutterstock
28 / 31 Fotos
Ideas
- Spending time together going on adventures or trying new things is great. For example, you could take a dance or cooking class together, or go on a trip.
© Shutterstock
29 / 31 Fotos
Ultimate goal
- Ultimately, it’s all about finding something that will allow feelings of intimacy, trust, and romantic passion to grow and flourish. Sources: (Verywell Mind) (BetterHelp) See also: The seven new love languages explained
© Shutterstock
30 / 31 Fotos
How to tell the difference between passionate and compassionate love
The scientific study of love
© Shutterstock
According to social psychologist Elaine Hatfield, there are two distinct types of love: passionate and compassionate. Passionate love is all about (surprise, surprise) passion. It's those constant thoughts of the other person, and the butterflies in your stomach whenever you meet. Compassionate love, on the other hand, is about deep emotional connections. It's about trusting someone to be there for you when times get tough.
Curious about how to tell which is which? Check out this gallery to find out more.
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