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See Also
See Again
© Shutterstock
0 / 27 Fotos
Reasons your child won't listen
- There are many reasons why your child isn't listening. Dive deeper into the 13 main reasons in the following slides.
© Shutterstock
1 / 27 Fotos
Your child feels disconnected
- Your child might not listen or communicate with you because they feel disconnected. Having a strong relationship with your child is important. Try spending 10 more minutes with them each day.
© Shutterstock
2 / 27 Fotos
Your child doesn't want to stop what they're doing
- If a child is engrossed in a certain activity, they may not want to listen to you as they are busy having fun. If you are short on time, use activities that are easier to transition out of.
© Shutterstock
3 / 27 Fotos
Your child didn't hear you
- When a child is caught up in something it can be difficult for them to save space to listen to you as the parent. Ensure when you do speak to them that you have their full attention.
© Shutterstock
4 / 27 Fotos
Your child doesn't have a complete grasp of time
- Children of all ages, but especially very young ones, often have a hard time with the concept of time. Be sure to utilize visual reminders or timers. Also, if you say you'll be there in a minute, stick to it.
© Shutterstock
5 / 27 Fotos
Your child doesn't want to do the task
- If your child is seemingly not listening, it may be that they actually just don't want to do the task you're requesting. Prompt them to share why this task feels daunting or share ways the task could be completed.
© Shutterstock
6 / 27 Fotos
Your child can't remember multiple instructions
- Young children often can't remember or have a hard time executing multi-step instructions. Be sure you are clearly and concisely breaking down the task at hand into simpler pieces.
© Shutterstock
7 / 27 Fotos
Your child wants to do a favored activity instead
- Your child is motivated by their interests, so they may not want to do a task you requested because they are busy doing something they actually like.
© Shutterstock
8 / 27 Fotos
Your child has been conditioned to wait until you yell
- Having to repeatedly ask your child to do something can instill bad habits in him or her. Even worse is if you yell to get your way. This will teach the child to do the same. Try to make clear, concise requests of your child.
© Shutterstock
9 / 27 Fotos
Your child doesn't like being reminded
- Repeating a phrase like "Pick up your shoes, please" can cause a child to ignore you. Try rewording and being purposeful with your requests. Also, consider using a visual chart of their positive behaviors or activities.
© Shutterstock
10 / 27 Fotos
Your child feels judged by your language and repeated requests
- Using negative language that judges your child can make them feel shamed and, therefore, much less likely to listen. Try a more collaborative approach where, instead of ultimatums, you offer help.
© Shutterstock
11 / 27 Fotos
You don't listen to your child, so your child doesn't want to listen to you
- Communicating with your child goes both ways. You must listen to them if you want them to listen to you. Children, like adults, want to feel seen and understood.
© Shutterstock
12 / 27 Fotos
You and your child don't understand each other's needs
- Your child is simply trying to meet a need when they are doing something you don't want them to. For example, they may be jumping on the bed. Their actual need is for fun and movement, so if you don't want them jumping on the bed specifically, provide another safe space for them to expend some energy.
© Shutterstock
13 / 27 Fotos
Your child needs more autonomy
- Children often choose to not listen because they need more autonomy. Just like adults, they want to have a say in what they value and do. Once they are more autonomous, then they'll likely listen more.
© Shutterstock
14 / 27 Fotos
What to do
- If your child isn't listening to you, fret not. There are ways in which you can better connect with them and subsequently have them listen more. Check out the following slides for ideas.
© Shutterstock
15 / 27 Fotos
Be specific
- If you are setting big, multiple-step goals for them it can get very confusing. Try using very simple and clear instructions that focus on one task at a time.
© Shutterstock
16 / 27 Fotos
Mirror habits
- Be sure you are choosing positive behaviors as your kiddo is always watching. If you don't listen, then what do you think the chances are that they will?
© Shutterstock
17 / 27 Fotos
Be patient
- Patience is a virtue, especially with your child. Try showing them it is okay to stumble and there are ways to continue forward. Encourage them to keep listening and trying.
© Shutterstock
18 / 27 Fotos
Stay calm
- Staying calm when things don't go as planned or when your child doesn't listen is key to their development. If you get frustrated and start yelling, they will likely shut down and refuse to listen even more.
© Shutterstock
19 / 27 Fotos
Praise good behaviors
- Praising your child when they do something you asked of them is a good way to encourage this behavior to occur again.
© Shutterstock
20 / 27 Fotos
Listen to them
- Be sure to listen to your child even when you're busy. Listening to them shows them you care and encourages them to listen to you, even when they are busy or engaged.
© Shutterstock
21 / 27 Fotos
Understand their developmental stage
- Be sure you think about where your child is developmentally speaking. While not every child matures the same, if a child is much younger, try simpler requests and slightly increase the difficulty as the child matures.
© Shutterstock
22 / 27 Fotos
Establish consistent routines
- Consistency helps children know what's expected of them. While they still must listen to receive relevant information, they generally know what's expected of them.
© Shutterstock
23 / 27 Fotos
Give them choices
- To help your child avoid decision paralysis and not listening to you, give them two choices. Do they want to do this or that? It gives the illusion of choice and empowers your child to decide for themselves.
© Shutterstock
24 / 27 Fotos
Use visual aids and reminders
- Your child may be a more visual learner so visual aids and reminders could help them listen, remember, and do the thing you requested of them.
© Shutterstock
25 / 27 Fotos
Address underlying emotions
- To help ensure your child is listening, address any underlying emotions they may be experiencing. By creating an open and safe space for them to share their emotions, they will learn to trust you and listen to you better.
Sources: (Psychology Today) (PyschCentral)
See also: Teaching kids good manners: politeness in everyday life
© Shutterstock
26 / 27 Fotos
© Shutterstock
0 / 27 Fotos
Reasons your child won't listen
- There are many reasons why your child isn't listening. Dive deeper into the 13 main reasons in the following slides.
© Shutterstock
1 / 27 Fotos
Your child feels disconnected
- Your child might not listen or communicate with you because they feel disconnected. Having a strong relationship with your child is important. Try spending 10 more minutes with them each day.
© Shutterstock
2 / 27 Fotos
Your child doesn't want to stop what they're doing
- If a child is engrossed in a certain activity, they may not want to listen to you as they are busy having fun. If you are short on time, use activities that are easier to transition out of.
© Shutterstock
3 / 27 Fotos
Your child didn't hear you
- When a child is caught up in something it can be difficult for them to save space to listen to you as the parent. Ensure when you do speak to them that you have their full attention.
© Shutterstock
4 / 27 Fotos
Your child doesn't have a complete grasp of time
- Children of all ages, but especially very young ones, often have a hard time with the concept of time. Be sure to utilize visual reminders or timers. Also, if you say you'll be there in a minute, stick to it.
© Shutterstock
5 / 27 Fotos
Your child doesn't want to do the task
- If your child is seemingly not listening, it may be that they actually just don't want to do the task you're requesting. Prompt them to share why this task feels daunting or share ways the task could be completed.
© Shutterstock
6 / 27 Fotos
Your child can't remember multiple instructions
- Young children often can't remember or have a hard time executing multi-step instructions. Be sure you are clearly and concisely breaking down the task at hand into simpler pieces.
© Shutterstock
7 / 27 Fotos
Your child wants to do a favored activity instead
- Your child is motivated by their interests, so they may not want to do a task you requested because they are busy doing something they actually like.
© Shutterstock
8 / 27 Fotos
Your child has been conditioned to wait until you yell
- Having to repeatedly ask your child to do something can instill bad habits in him or her. Even worse is if you yell to get your way. This will teach the child to do the same. Try to make clear, concise requests of your child.
© Shutterstock
9 / 27 Fotos
Your child doesn't like being reminded
- Repeating a phrase like "Pick up your shoes, please" can cause a child to ignore you. Try rewording and being purposeful with your requests. Also, consider using a visual chart of their positive behaviors or activities.
© Shutterstock
10 / 27 Fotos
Your child feels judged by your language and repeated requests
- Using negative language that judges your child can make them feel shamed and, therefore, much less likely to listen. Try a more collaborative approach where, instead of ultimatums, you offer help.
© Shutterstock
11 / 27 Fotos
You don't listen to your child, so your child doesn't want to listen to you
- Communicating with your child goes both ways. You must listen to them if you want them to listen to you. Children, like adults, want to feel seen and understood.
© Shutterstock
12 / 27 Fotos
You and your child don't understand each other's needs
- Your child is simply trying to meet a need when they are doing something you don't want them to. For example, they may be jumping on the bed. Their actual need is for fun and movement, so if you don't want them jumping on the bed specifically, provide another safe space for them to expend some energy.
© Shutterstock
13 / 27 Fotos
Your child needs more autonomy
- Children often choose to not listen because they need more autonomy. Just like adults, they want to have a say in what they value and do. Once they are more autonomous, then they'll likely listen more.
© Shutterstock
14 / 27 Fotos
What to do
- If your child isn't listening to you, fret not. There are ways in which you can better connect with them and subsequently have them listen more. Check out the following slides for ideas.
© Shutterstock
15 / 27 Fotos
Be specific
- If you are setting big, multiple-step goals for them it can get very confusing. Try using very simple and clear instructions that focus on one task at a time.
© Shutterstock
16 / 27 Fotos
Mirror habits
- Be sure you are choosing positive behaviors as your kiddo is always watching. If you don't listen, then what do you think the chances are that they will?
© Shutterstock
17 / 27 Fotos
Be patient
- Patience is a virtue, especially with your child. Try showing them it is okay to stumble and there are ways to continue forward. Encourage them to keep listening and trying.
© Shutterstock
18 / 27 Fotos
Stay calm
- Staying calm when things don't go as planned or when your child doesn't listen is key to their development. If you get frustrated and start yelling, they will likely shut down and refuse to listen even more.
© Shutterstock
19 / 27 Fotos
Praise good behaviors
- Praising your child when they do something you asked of them is a good way to encourage this behavior to occur again.
© Shutterstock
20 / 27 Fotos
Listen to them
- Be sure to listen to your child even when you're busy. Listening to them shows them you care and encourages them to listen to you, even when they are busy or engaged.
© Shutterstock
21 / 27 Fotos
Understand their developmental stage
- Be sure you think about where your child is developmentally speaking. While not every child matures the same, if a child is much younger, try simpler requests and slightly increase the difficulty as the child matures.
© Shutterstock
22 / 27 Fotos
Establish consistent routines
- Consistency helps children know what's expected of them. While they still must listen to receive relevant information, they generally know what's expected of them.
© Shutterstock
23 / 27 Fotos
Give them choices
- To help your child avoid decision paralysis and not listening to you, give them two choices. Do they want to do this or that? It gives the illusion of choice and empowers your child to decide for themselves.
© Shutterstock
24 / 27 Fotos
Use visual aids and reminders
- Your child may be a more visual learner so visual aids and reminders could help them listen, remember, and do the thing you requested of them.
© Shutterstock
25 / 27 Fotos
Address underlying emotions
- To help ensure your child is listening, address any underlying emotions they may be experiencing. By creating an open and safe space for them to share their emotions, they will learn to trust you and listen to you better.
Sources: (Psychology Today) (PyschCentral)
See also: Teaching kids good manners: politeness in everyday life
© Shutterstock
26 / 27 Fotos
Reasons your kids aren’t listening (and what to do instead)
How to connect better with your children
© Shutterstock
Are you having a challenging time getting your child to listen to you? If so, you're not alone. Parents everywhere often struggle with disobedient children who won't or choose not to listen to them. In this gallery, you'll find 13 common reasons your kids might not be listening to you, followed by what to do instead and ideas for encouraging them to listen. If you're unsure what to do to teach your child the best listening skills, read through today.
Curious how you can help teach your children to listen better? Click through now.
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