Not all soulmates are made equal
Have you ever found yourself absolutely infuriated by another person's behavior, only to later come to the conclusion that you were in the wrong? If so, you may have experienced the blessings of an Uninvited Buddha.
The term, first coined by author Andrea Miller, refers to someone who shows up in your life in a disruptive manner. While you may resent them at first, with time you may come to appreciate the lessons they've taught you.
Curious? Check out this gallery to find out more.
Most people are familiar with the concept of an uninvited guest. Indeed, it happens all too often that people show up at parties, despite not having been invited.
Fewer people are familiar with the concept of an Uninvited Buddha. This term was first used by author Andrea Miller during her podcast ‘Getting Open.’
An Uninvited Buddha is someone who shows up in your life and, at face value, serves no other purpose than to cause you grief.
However, when you scratch below the surface, the Uninvited Buddha always has a lesson to teach you. The lesson is usually one you didn't know you needed to learn.
To help illustrate the concept better, let’s look at some common examples. First up is that friend who checks you on your behavior and tells you when you’re wrong.
For example, imagine you lash out at a family member because they make a suggestion about how you should do something. You may perceive this as a critique.
Of course, criticism can be difficult to hear, particularly if it triggers long-held insecurities. However, it generally isn't a reason to lash out or criticize back.
The Uninvited Buddha in this scenario is that friend who checks you for overreacting. In the moment, it may seem like they are not supporting you, but they're trying to help you see a situation more clearly.
Next up is that person who refuses to let you off the hook. Of course, there should be a limit to stubbornness, and forgiveness is always an important lesson.
We've all been in situations where we have apologized to someone for something we have done. Sometimes, they simply won’t accept the apology. It can be absolutely infuriating.
Most of the time, people who refuse an apology do so because they sense it is not sincere. Sometimes, we may rush to apologize to others for the wrong reason.
The Uninvited Buddha in this scenario, then, is that person who refuses to let you off the hook. It can feel like a kick in the teeth, but in fact it is one of the important ways we grow.
Another common Uninvited Buddha is that person who shames you or makes you feel bad about yourself for no reason.
We've all been in situations where another person has made a snide comment about us or suggested we are inferior in some way.
Such malicious behavior can make us feel terrible in the moment. Upon reflection, however, there is an important lesson to be learned.
The lesson from this Uninvited Buddha is that we are not obliged to buy into anything other people say about us. Often, their comments reflect solely upon themselves.
There are those who are always late and seem completely incapable of changing their habits. It could be a colleague, friend, or family member.
Chronically late people can be very frustrating. They can provoke feelings of distrust and even shame. For example, perhaps you were always the last child picked up from school and it left you feeling ashamed.
This Uninvited Buddha may have an important lesson to teach us, however, about the fact we cannot control our timelines, even if we are desperate to do so.
This Uninvited Buddha can teach us about the importance of not setting unrealistic expectations for other people or putting them on pedestals.
The next Uninvited Buddha on the list is that person who always speaks over others. Most people know someone like this, or maybe you can identify with this behavior.
Being interrupted and spoken over can be very annoying, particularly for people who are already shy and introverted.
However, everyone can learn a lesson from this Uninvited Buddha about being more assertive and setting boundaries with other people.
Having someone in your life who doesn’t realize or simply doesn’t care when they are talking over you can help you identify strategies in which you can make yourself heard.
And, finally, we have the Uninvited Buddha who ghosts. Many of us have been in a situation where we’ve been speaking to someone, whether romantically or platonically, and, suddenly, they disappear.
Being ghosted can be very difficult, as it leaves people feeling very rejected and confused. There is always a silver lining, however.
On the one hand, being ghosted by your Uninvited Buddha provides you with an opportunity to reconsider your self-worth and maybe come to the realization that that person is not supposed to be in your life.
On the other hand, this Uninvited Buddha can help you realize which qualities you seek in friendships and romantic partners. It can also highlight which qualities you should try to avoid.
Sources: (YourTango)
See also: The different types of emotions and their effect on human behavior
What is an Uninvited Buddha?
Those annoying people sent to teach us a lesson
LIFESTYLE Concepts
Have you ever found yourself absolutely infuriated by another person's behavior, only to later come to the conclusion that you were in the wrong? If so, you may have experienced the blessings of an Uninvited Buddha.
The term, first coined by author Andrea Miller, refers to someone who shows up in your life in a disruptive manner. While you may resent them at first, with time you may come to appreciate the lessons they've taught you.
Curious? Check out this gallery to find out more.